We met a long time ago...

Dear Ms. Ramella,

Our relationship started way before we met in person. At times I wonder if your existence is something somehow engraved in my deeper subconcious being. The way you match me and delight me seems as if you were always in my dreams.

I came to the Palouse in the fall of 1998. I was too cheap/not interested in TV but had a radio. Radio was my most common connection with the world. NPR was on every morning and every evening until the classics started. I enjoyed all the news and weekend shows. I took pride in being a regular listener because I felt my life was enriched by listening more. And it was all I had.

When I would get home I would turn the radio on and get pleasure out of hearing your voice update me on the goings on in the world. I actually preferred you the most. You were so lively, upbeat and fresh. I was attracted to your voice immediately and fantacized about meeting you. I thought it would be great to meet you over dinner in Seattle somewhere. I pictured a 30 something (~35) dark brown hair with some curls, a big smile. I saw you fit and beautiful, kind of like Gloria Estefan but with more of a mediteranean exotic heritage. You were there with me when I would make dinner and study. You were with me in many intimate moments. The blinds pulled down, you and I. My attraction was never psycho stalker like, but more gave me boyish giggle and dreamy sigh whenever I heard you. In my apartment or on anyone else's radio. I pictured you married, mother, 10 years older than me and incognito on the west side. But part of me thought and knew if I could meet you in between your marriage, I could rock your world and be a great man to you. I actually imagined sweeping you off your feet. Seriously.

I am thankful for all that we have went through to get to here. Through past searches for love, I smile to realize all the time you were always there. One experience is bold in my mind where I can see the power of you in my life. I was camped on Vancouver Island looking back to Washington. I was alone, just had an encounter with a bear, and felt myself in a height of my manhood. I was determined and felt strong in myself. I also felt primal needs... for a partner. To form my own clan. And when I looked back to the mainland I felt a sense of emptiness in my current relationship. I didn't recieve what I gave to her. I felt something flaky about her, but I believed so much in her that I didn't think it would matter. I actually thought my love could make her a better person. So battling with this (June 2006) I get in my truck and tuned in one of your stations near Port Angeles. It was the warm familiarity I had known since I first ventured out on my own. All triggered by hearing you, I felt home. I was filled with hope in my dreams.

I stopped and had a wonderful homecooked meal. Again you on the radio, and I reveled in your sucess and magnitude, reaching so many miles away with your warm spirit. I got giddy and remember thinking to myself... There she is again. What if I met her someday? I drove on many miles of road thinking I was driving further from you, but I was actually getting closer. My life has never been the same.

I love you Ms. Ramella.

You are so much fun!!

Dear Ms. Ramella,

I am so impressed at your willingness to try new things and your athletic ability.


"Sure, I'll try snowboarding with you," you say. Friends warned me. They said not to try doing this with your significant other. Get her lessons. You have been doing it for so long she will just get frustrated with you because she isn't at the same level. People told me stories of arguments and general unfun times when they were going to try what I did.

With you Ms. Ramella, the whole world has been different and I realized not many people have what we have. I know you are understanding and want to teach me. You love to see my world. That is why I thought to heck with what they all say, I'm going to teach you. Let's see... 14 years vs a day snowboarding.

Right off the bat you make it all the way up the rope tow and that is freakin hard. Dare I say natural? I imagine your long, slender, buxom body at home poised on a surfboard at some tropical isle. Soon we're on to the big stuff and you actually connect turns. You fell but kept pulling yourself up, all while keeping your great attitude. You've got great poise, and even the little kids get out of your way like you are a force to be reconed with.



What a fun and amazing day. You wanted to go longer than some of my friends. You are amazing. If this is how new adventures are going to be with you, gimme gimme more.

To be with you...

To be with you is to be with my best friend.

To be with you is to live in my dreams and beyond. At times this feels like dreaming, but dreams could not be so perfect.

To be with you is to be with an incredible independent woman.

To be with you is to be with one who shows her love for me more than any other.

Sueann, thank you for last weekend. The time we spend together is how I would like any time with a partner to be. Together we get things done. We cook together, plan together, go on adventures together, get up early together, all with such comfort and ease. You make it easy to love you, because you are so wonderful and giving, the perfect realization of everything I need in a partner. Just when it seems like I am already in nirvana with you, you take me a step further. And this happens everyday, growing and beaming inside me with our shared desires, our shared love.

To be with you is where I want to be, today, tomorrow, the day after and every day after.

What you do to me

Happy Valentine's Day Baby!

I have never been so in love
Time and time past do not compare
Yet it takes me back
Feeling that rooted deep in my existence
Adolescent energy caveman urges
Without question
You hit all the right senses in me
All one needs in life
For every day with you is a slice of heaven
The best partner for any adventure
In my mind all times
Wanting you more with each breath
My desire grows exponentially
Even more when we are apart
Ecstatic, wanting, grunting, clawing
All it takes is your smell
Taste of divine intervention
You are perfection to me
Please understand as I try to explain
You were made for me, and I was made for you
It’s in our genetics, in our blood.
Together we make the most beautiful poetry.


Sweet dreams fill my head
Living with the vision of you in my life

Yours in loyal, loving compassion

Ben